My Titan
by ShingekiNoJudgement
Summary: My Immortal (my immortal is an infamous fanfiction-look it up if you don't know what it is before reading) Parody. Meet Crimson, Levi, Eren, Mikasa, Annie, and the others. (Possible TW: anything in my immortal that caused problems for you. AND this is a joke, so don't take it literally-please)
1. Chapter 1

Hi my name is Crimson Darkness Merken Rose Way and I have long dark red hair (that's how I got my name) with black streaks and brown tips that reaches my mid-back and icy blue eyes like limpid tears and a lot of people tell me I look like a hotter Petra (AN: if u don't know who she is get da hell out of here!). I'm not related to Eren Jaeger but I wish I was because he's a major fucking hottie. I'm a titan shifter but I can transform whenever I want but my form varies. I'm also on the special ops squad. I live in Wall Sina with the Scouting Legion to help retake wall Maria. I'm also in the Recon Corps and Survey Corps, in case you couldn't tell. I love Cold Titan and I buy all my clothes there. For example, today I am wearing a rainbow harness and otherwise black uniform. I teased up my hair until I had a satisfying poof. I'm wearing red lipstick, bronzer, and red eyeliner. I was walking around the fortress It was raining and cold which I was very happy at me. A lot of the military police stared at me. I put up my middle finger at them.

"Hey Crimson!" shouted a voice. I looked up. It was…. Levi!

"What's up Levi?"

"Nothing." he said shyly.

But then, I heard my friends call me and I had to go away.


	2. Chapter 2

The next day I woke up in my bedroom. It was snowing and raining again. I fot out of my bed. My bed was crimson blood and inside it was black with blood marks. I got out of my coffin and took off my giant Titan Killerz t-shirt which I used for pajamas. Instead, I put on a my uniform but today I wore a red 3DMG harness with gold buckles. I put on four pairs of earrings in my pierced ears, and put my hair in a kind of messy friend, Sierra (Elsa, dis is u) woke up then and grinned at me. She flipped her long waist-length white hair with pink streaks and opened her light purple eyes. She put on her Boiling Walls t-shirt with a pink mini, fishnets and pointy high-heeled boots. We put on our makeup (red lipstick bronzer and gold eyeliner.)

"OMFG, I saw you talking to Levi yesterday!" she said excitedly.  
"Yeah? So?" I said, blushing.  
"Do you like Levi?" she asked as we went out of the drill field and into the PT field.  
"No I so fucking don't!" I shouted.  
"Yeah right!" she exclaimed. Just then, Levi walked up to me.  
"Hi." he said.  
"Hi." I replied flirtily.  
"Guess what." he said.  
"What?" I asked.  
"Well, Titan Killerz are having a concert in this district." he told me.

"Oh. My. Fucking. God!" I screamed. I love TK. They are my favorite band, besides Boiling Walls.  
"Well…. do you want to go with me?" he asked.  
I gasped.


	3. Chapter 3

On the night of the concert I put on my red lace-up boots with high heels. Underneath them was my harness. Then I put on a black leather minidress with all this corset stuff on the back and front. I put on the second part of the harness on my arms. I straightened my hair and made it look all spiky. I felt a little depressed then, so I slit one of my wrists. I read a depressing book while I waited for it to stop bleeding and I listened to some Titan Killerz. I painted my nails black and put on TONS of red eyeliner. Then I put on some red lipstick. I didnI went outside. Levi was waiting there in front of his 3DMG. He was wearing a cravat and a red shirt and black pants and brown boots (AN: A lot fo kewl boiz wer it ok!).

Hi Levi! he said back

We flew to the place with the concert with our 3DMG. On the way we listened excitedly to Titan Killerz and Squad from Hell. We both smoked cigarettes and drugs. When we got there, we landed. We went to the mosh pit at the front of the stage and jumped up and down as we listened to Titan Killerz.

"You come in cold, you're covered in blood  
They're all so sad you've arrived  
The commander grabs the arm, hands it to your mom  
She realizes you've lost your life." sang Auruo (I don't own da lyrics 2 dat song).  
"Auruo is so fucking hot." I said to Levi, pointing to him as he sung, filling the club with his amazing voice.  
Suddenly Levi looked sad.  
"What's wrong?" I asked as we moshed to the music. Then I caught on.  
"Hey, it's ok I don't like him better than YOU!" I said.  
"Really?" asked Levi sensitively and he put his arm around me all protective.  
"Really." I said. "Besides I don't even know Auruo and he's going out with Petra fucking Ral. I fucking hate that little bitch." I said disgustedly, thinking of her ugly strawberry blonde face.  
The night went on really well, and I had a great time. So did Levi. After the concert, we drank some beer and asked Gunther and Auruo for their autographs and photos with them. We got TKz concert tees. Levi and I crawled back with our 3DMGs, but Levi didn't go back into the fortress, instead he drove the car into… the Forest of Giant Trees!


End file.
